Already Gone
by nimerin
Summary: One shot. Have you ever tried to convince yourself you belonged somewhere when your heart tried to tell u the truth.


I wrote this will listened to a song that I have no idea the name of or who sings it, but hey, it sure was inspiring! The poem at the end is mine, which no one I am sure will want since its horrible. O well enjoy!

Disclaimer: me not own, my lack of money in the bank account proves it.

Gone

By: Nimerin

Kagome was sitting in the park one sunny Sunday afternoon. She was using this afternoon as a break from shard hunting which she would return to later that evening. 'Just two more hours until I return to Sengoku Jidai. Till I see my friends. Till I return to Inuyasha.' Kagome mused. 'I should feel more disappointed tha this. I mean I am after all missing out on my life.'

'My life… funny every time I come back I can't stop thinking about them. About him. I never think about my friends and family here as often when I'm there. Has that really become more my life than here?'

'That's just silly. I was born here. I've lived this life for fifteen years. There's just no way a year in the past could have changed that.'

'But it's not just about the time I have spent there that makes me feel like that. I am different then I was before. I have faced monsters that people wouldn't dare dream of. I have helped save lives. I have mad friends that I consider family. And I have fallen in love. Albeit it is with a jealous jerk of a dog demon. But sometimes he can just be so sweet that it doesn't matter.'

'I have to stop this line of thinking and enjoy the time I have here.' Kagome forced herself out of her reverie and began to pay avid attention to the gossiping girls in front of her.

For all of ten seconds. Wow, record time.

'This is a really pretty park. A nice break from the concrete in the city. It is not nearly as breathtaking as the past though. I wonder what this area looks like there. Let's see, I am sure I have been here before; I mean I pretty much have been traipsing all over the past Tokyo. It took us fifteen minutes to get here from my house and we traveled south. Hum… so considering the pace Inuyasha sets plus the setbacks of waiting for Miroku to recover consciousness, I think…that would put us roughly seven minutes maybe five, from the Goshinboku.' Kagome's mind shifted to the mental image of this area in the past and she absorbed herself in it blocking out all of her times distractions as she leaned back with her eyes closed. 'Yes it is so much prettier back home. So much more serene. Well, minus the bloodthirsty youkai of course.'

"Kagome? Kagome?"

"Huh?" Kagome snapped her eyes open confusedly and found herself staring at her friends hand. 'Wow, she really could use some lotion.' She thought absently.

"Kagome, you kinda spaced out there. You're not feeling ill again are you? I mean the bubonic plague must be hard to recover from." Yuka asked after removing her hand from in front of her friends vacant face.

Kagome sweat-dropped. 'Jii-chan you are so going to get it.' "No, I am fine. Really."

"Okay…" The girls immediately picked up their conversation where they had left off; and Kagome immediately tuned them out again. I mean really, who cares if the assistant principal wore reindeer ears to school (an: mine did, it was a big scandal at school since it was November) when you could be fantasizing about a hot guy with dog ears.

Her attention strayed to the grass where two girls were playing Frisbee. Kagome smiled softly. 'They remind me off Sango. I bet she could put a wicked spin on that Frisbee though.' She giggled. 'Yep, straight at Miroku's head when he tried to grope her. I think Shippo would enjoy playing with one. It is not really often he gets to play with any of us like that. Maybe we could even teach Kirara to play. Of course, Inuyasha would probably spend the whole time growling about what a waste of time it was.' A soft sigh escaped her lips. 'Oh Inuyasha, I wonder what you are doing right now.'

'Gah! I am doing it again! Focus, Kagome, focus. Train your concentration on the conversation taking place in front of you.' Kagome tried, she really did, but after a few seconds her vision got hazy. 'Can't concentrate, my brains shutting down. Kuso! Eep! I did not just think that. I have been around Inuyasha too long.'

'But I will stay by him even longer if given half the chance. I belong with him, with them, back home. Home, it really is that now. I never really do leave it, even when I am here my heart stays there.' Kagome suddenly got up and put her purse on her shoulder. "See you guys." She waved absently to her friends who looked after her very bewildered.

"She's leaving ?" Eri questioned.

Kagome's reply was too soft for any of them to hear. "I was always gone."

I'm already gone

I haven't been here

For so very long

And as I search my soul

I am not sure that I

Could ever claim I was

Every really here

It hurts to miss

That part of me

The hole in my heart

Lost someplace in history

I have put up a façade

And forced myself to belong

I have only been pretending

It was never really wholly me

I have been missing all along

For I am someplace else

So this must be ending

I only ask one thing

Please try not to miss me

For I was never truly here

I was always already gone.

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AN: please review. I don't have much else to say so bye!


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